The Vignette is a short sketch of a spiritual experience that has an often surprising, always lasting, impact.

 

When I was a little girl, I played with dolls and dreamed of the day when I would become a mother. I always wanted to be a mom.

I grew older, and my friends began having their menstrual cycles. But not me—and I was jealous, and worried. Why hadn’t I started my period? What was wrong with me?

My mother took me to the gynecologist more to ease my mind and not because she thought anything was wrong. But after an examination, the doctor told my mother as I sat there and listened that there were problems after all. I had a split uterus and would never be able to have children. I couldn’t believe it. What about my dreams of becoming a mother?

Even though I was young, and not supposed to be thinking about having a child, I was so very sad. I thought about it a lot.

My parents told me not to worry about it, that I was just supposed to concentrate on my studies.

My parents also said something else. They told me that the doctor didn’t necessarily know … that if God wanted me to have a child, I would.

I found comfort in those words, but still I feared that the doctor was right.

Years later, that same doctor was in the delivery room when I gave birth to my son, Santino Jordan, a healthy baby boy. She was crying.

And even though I am a single mom, my parents saw their grandson, who is now 14, only as a blessing.

I know now that that dream of mine as a little girl was not for naught, and that my parents were right: If God wanted me to have a child, I would. And God did.

 

SOURCES OF INSPIRATION
for Danyale Marshall
 
“Time is Life” by Patti Labelle
 
Cotton Candy on a Rainy Day by Nikki Giovanni
 
Four Studies of the Head of a Negro by Peter Paul Rubens

 

About The Author

Danyale Marshall

Danyale Marshall is the mother of Santino Jordan.

Dianne Ebbs

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